Day 213
So far, many people who have answered my survey on happiness in my Happiness Vox Pop Friday night column, have mentioned something that I find very interesting. To the question : What do you do when you're feeling sad?, Dee Dee Johnson, Serge Medawar and Kelly Wilson answered that they first acknowledged their suffering, before trying to take control of their emotions and move on.
My tendency is probably to push away any type of suffering. As I mentioned in a previous post, it is a very North American thing to do ( see Happiness: East against West). It is also very Egyptian. The problem is, when you brush off sadness, it builds up and, one way or another, ends up coming out.
My friend Sara told me an interesting story. One of her friends was suffering from heavy migraines. She went to see an acupuncturist who first chose to treat her once a month. After a couple of visits, he gave her an appointment for the next week. She was quite surprised: why did he want to see her back so quickly? After that treatment, the girl cried for a week nonstop. She is not an emotional person, so she was wondering what was going on with her. She would cry at work, at home, while driving... she thought she was going through a depression. When she went back to the acupuncturist, he told her that her migraines were caused by a build-up of emotions. After that treatment, she stopped having them.
I'm not suggesting you should hollow in your suffering for too long... But a good cry can really be beneficial. New York Times reporter Benedict Carey referred to tears in an article published in 2009 as “emotional perspiration”. And since perspiration helps get rid of toxins, crying could serve as a kind of emotional cleansing!
Some people cry very easily; others never cry. In fact, tears are not that necessary. What is important is, at least, acknowledging suffering and, confronting and dealing with your emotions instead of avoiding them!!!! It's not easy to do. It's much easier to just brush them aside and try to forget about them. But I believe it to be necessary in order to attain a maximum level of mental and emotional wellbeing.
"The sorrow which has no vent in tears may make other organs weep".
Henry Maudsley
“The truth that many people never understand, until it is too late, is that the more you try to avoid suffering the more you suffer because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you in proportion to your fear of being hurt.”
Thomas Merton
"Tearless grief bleeds inwardly".
Christian Nevell Bovee
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