Friday, April 8, 2011

DAY 188 - HAPPINESS VOX POP - KELLY WILSON, SPECIALIST IN BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION WITH AUTISTIC CHILDREN

Day 188

KELLY WILSON

I am a 43 yearold divorced mother of 2 wonderful (although they drive me crazy at times and eat waaay too much) teenagers aged 15 and 16, 3 cats and 2 dogs. I was with my ex-husband for 22 years (since I was 17) before we divorced after working through his 9 year addiction to cocaine. I come from a very close family of 5 (4 older brothers), we spend most Sunday dinners together still and support each other a lot.

I am in a relationship with a great person who also has 2 children, although we do not live together (or because we don’t) we get along splendidly. He is a wonderful dad with wonderful kids and we are happy together (knock on wood).

What is happiness for you?

Happiness for me is to be able to enjoy all the moments in life (the good and the bad) without regret. Try to live life to its fullest (cease the day as they say) by not taking yourself or others too seriously. Appreciating life and trying not to waist this precious gift on things that are often stupidities.


Has your profession impacted your level and your vision of happiness? If yes, how?

 I am a specialist in behaviour modification working with behaviourally challenged autistic children. (Aged 1-18). I have worked in the field for 24 years and love my job (especially on days when I don’t get bitten or kicked). My job keeps me forever thankful that I have 2 healthy happy children while so many loving parents struggle with severe crisis in their families. I also get to (in some cases) feel that I positively impacted parental relationships and at times changed a whole family dynamic and gave the power back to the parents. 

Between teaching therapists how to work with my families and coaching parents on setting limits with their kids it is always interesting and rewarding. How lucky I am to have a job that can stimulate my interests, work with professionals, and laugh at all the funny things that kids do! My job makes me feel that I am not entitled to look at my life and be unhappy when I face so many difficult situations and deprived people who are so much worse off than me.  Oddly enough, most of them are pretty happy. Go Figure!!


Has your vision of happiness greatly changed through time?

No, over time the idea of the happiness I seek has remained the same.  I have always wanted and worked at being happy by focusing on all the blessings in my life. By doing this kind of thing, you usually just find more to be happy about as you get older…if it is working.

Do you believe you have control on your level of happiness?

Yes, I do believe that we have a big impact on our own level of happiness. In regular cases (not where there are any chemical imbalances) we can do many things to help ourselves be happier. Like all the suggestions in this blog that have been proven to enhance wellbeing, nothing comes from nothing, things take effort. If you want to be happy you need to actively seek it.

What do you do to change your mood when you’re feeling sad?

I try to give myself the time to feel sad if I have good reason, listening to music is the best one but then after a pre-set period of time I kick myself in the ass and, at least, physically move on to something else and then the mental aspect usually will follow.  

On the whole, would you say you are a happy person?
Yes, I feel that I am generally a happy person.  
  

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