DAY 110 - HAPPINESS: THE FOUR AGREEMENTS

Day 110

Countless people, including me, have created lists of what is essential to happiness.  Don Miguel Ruiz, bestselling author, is no exception.  Inspired by the Ancient Toltec of Mexico’s philosophy, which he is a descendant of, in the Four Agreements, Ruiz formulates four principles one should abide by to find the true path to freedom and happiness.

The First Agreement – Be Impeccable with your Word

Always mean what you say and always say what you mean.   In this agreement, Ruiz talks about speaking with integrity, love and truth.  He acknowledges that the truth can sometimes be hurtful to others and that the art of integrity also lies in knowing when to be verbal and when to be silent.  He believes that we should avoid using the power of the words to talk badly about ourselves or about others.

The Second Agreement – Don't Take Anything Personally

I find that one particularly interesting.  Most of us interpret what other people say with our own set of beliefs and baggage.  What Ruiz is saying is that what people tell you is a reflection of their own interpretation of the world and feelings, and that, in the end, their words do not reflect in any way the way you are. Ruiz goes on to say, “When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.”

The Third Agreement – Don't Make Assumptions

We take the word of others and often create a whole drama, perhaps because we have some kind of need to spice up our lives.  Some people are especially good at it, often using their imagination to create a situation that simply doesn’t exist.  Why not just ask for a clarification.  Are the words, “what do you mean”, “is that what you are saying”, so hard to pronounce that we prefer imagining rather than really knowing. 

We often assume that people see the world exactly the way we do and are the way we are, and so we tend to analyze and interpret their actions according to our own way of viewing life. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama.    

The Fourth Agreement – Always Do Your Best

 Ruiz acknowledges that doing your best can vary, depending on your mood, your health and your circumstances.  However, he believes that you should always do the best you can at any given moment in your life. By doing so, you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.  Doing your best means enjoying the action without expecting a reward.  The pleasure comes from doing what you like in life and having fun, not from how much you get paid.  Enjoy the path traveled and the destination will take care of itself.

Many people have said that reading The Four Agreements was a life-changing experience.  The four-agreement philosophy is certainly an eye opener.   Transformation, though, requires far more than knowledge.  It is the ability to turn knowledge into action, and that takes work and commitment.