Dan Gilbert, eminent Harvard teacher and psychologist, in a book called “Stumbling on Happiness” talks about the fact that human beings cannot imagine the future in a realistic manner. In other terms, when you picture yourself with more money, a lover or a brand new house, your imagination romanticizes and exaggerates the feelings of happiness that situation would potentially provide you with. The imagined reaction to a negative experience, such as losing your job or a break up, is also far from reality.
When I was 20 years old, I went on a six-month trip to Europe with my friend Christina. I remember saving money and thinking about that trip for more than a year, picturing myself in a constant state of ecstasy as I was discovering European marvels. When you have a long-term objective, you really have time to visualize yourself in that situation. However, as we were traveling, I quickly realized that I didn’t feel the exaltation I thought I would. I had good days and bad days just like when I was at home.
Dan Gilbert goes on to say that we are also far from reality when it comes to the past. Our memory tends to alter events and our reaction to them either in a positive or a negative way. I guess it depends on each person’s individual nature. Optimists might picture themselves happier than they really were and pessimists might worsen the reality.
The matter of the fact is if we tend to be delusional when it comes to the future and the past, why waste the greater part of our life thinking about past or future events. Why not take advantage of every moment instead, making sure happiness is found every minute of every day?
Alright, I admit it, I might be a little unrealistic and a little delusional when it comes to imagining how one could enjoy the present moment at all times. However, by being conscious of the need to make the best of every situation in our lives and by living in the present as much as possible, we could all get a little closer to that much sought after permanent state of happiness.
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